Category: Jodi

Hike to 4th of July Lake – missing my sister and mom here! Brad, Dad, Scott, Eric, and me

I just returned home last night from a wonderful reunion with my extended Baldwin family – the family I grew up with. This year we went to Stanley, ID. It was a beautiful place to behold.

As I've been attending various events with my brothers and sister and their families over the year – this weekend included, I have been paying attention to my inner self. I've been trying to make sense out of my identity and role as a sister. Sometimes amidst the busy days of life, I forget that I am a sister. I begin to live as if my role as a sister is more past tense than present or future. So I'm left to wonder, what is my purpose now in this family that I grew up in, how do I fit in with my extended family as I bring my own growing family and husband along, how am I assessed by extended family as they see me more rarely than often? What kind of impression do I leave when we all depart large family gatherings?

Do they know of my concern for each of them and their children? Do they realize how much I care about what happens to them personally? Do they understand how important they still are to me in my life? I'm for sure that I am NOT good at communicating effectively or clearly all of those feelings, especially in such a short and sporadic time such as a weekend. I hope that layers upon layers over the process of a lifetime will suffice. The demands and schedules of my own immediate families needs feel hard enough to keep up with right now, but I'm discovering that my care and concern is still there for my siblings who've helped me become the person I am today. I fear that my desires and actions of expression are not evenly matched up at this point.

All of us have obviously moved on down life's trail – getting married, having children, learning to stay tough through trials and disappointment, & rejoicing in moments of bliss. We no longer have the same relationships we did when we lived behind the walls of our old Burton home. I no longer hear the rock music blasting from my oldest brother, Brad's, radio, I don't get to share a bedroom with my big sister, Michelle, anymore. I'm not getting rides to school with my brother Eric, or singing songs at the piano with Scott very often these days. What I find interesting is that although these relationships have changed out of necessity of growing older, the feeling of being a little sister remains in tact. Because of my little sister role, I think I will always be seeking approval, validation, and advice from all of the above persons mentioned the rest of my life. Is it a bad thing? I realize now that each of us siblings have many different ideals, approaches, and pressures to living life, but I also understand now that different doesn't necessarily mean better or worse.

My hope is that I can be good enough, that I can make them proud, that they will feel unconditionally loved by me, that I can bring honor to our family name. Because out of all of the people in the entire universe, Heavenly Father sent the five of us, in our mortal state, to GET be called FaMiLy.

Comments:

Stephen said…

Very well put, I feel the same way in my family. So it must be right 🙂
Monday, August 22, 2011 2:16:00 PM

Michelle said…

Great thoughts-I can sure do better in that department.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011 8:25:12 AM

Magan said…

You are the real deal Jodi! A wonderful example to us all. Thank for all you do.
Thursday, August 25, 2011 7:07:55 PM

Not board games. Not card games. Not party games. Not video games. Not sports games. Not even Olympic games.

No, the games I'm thinking about are the silly games people play with each other. The mind games. The reading between the lines games. The subliminal and obscure meanings and messages people send out. I'm calling them the people games. Sometimes we transition from acting grown up to reverting back into a child like state. I am a people watcher and have noticed. I am a person and have played.

Like…Have you ever been in a store and seen someone you know and purposefully turn and go the other direction so they won't see you? Like….being disappointed and hurt, acting like it isn't a big deal to the person who hurt us – and then holding a grudge (sometimes for years!) And what is the silent treatment all about, what does it accomplish?

Why do we sometimes play crazy emotional games with each other? Why can't we all just be real? Do we sometimes feel afraid that people won't like the "real us"? Are we so confused with our own selves that we don't expect anyone to "get" us? Do we choose to make our previous comments or choices (or even others) enslave us and live up to the person we think people expect us to be? Why is it easier at sometimes to give someone the "benefit of the doubt", and also on the other hand, find it such a natural reaction to be critical or judgmental of others? Is it possible that we build unnecessary fences so high that we can't climb over them?

I've been there, done that, still DO that! Why?! It is silly. It is pointless. It hurts us and the people around us. It limits us. It confines and sentences us to feelings of sadness.

Here is something I've noticed for myself about playing these kind of people games. I'm thinking way too much about myself! When I am earnestly (not casually) seeking to be Christlike, actively seeking to think, act, become like Him the Game is Over! It is a powerful force to recon with – that kind of pure Love!

And just to throw it out there – this rambling is to be taken at face value. No people games being played here….:)

Comments:

Stephen said…

Great point. Amen!
Friday, July 22, 2011 8:25:01 AM

Ri Ri said…

In church today we talked about being optimistic during our lesson. I think part of that is being open and willing to be there. We all need to try to have a good and strong relationship with each other as a family and also with Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father. We need to be happy and willing and that way we will have more opportunities and friends.
Sunday, July 24, 2011 5:20:36 PM

We did it!

Today I was able to enjoy a beautiful day running in the Teton Dam Half Marathon. I really enjoyed it and felt so great when I crossed the finish line. I set this goal for myself back in January and more than a few times didn't know if it would really happen. I am so glad it all worked out! It felt good to accomplish my goal.

For a person who claims to NOT be a "runner", I've decided to own up to the fact that I guess I like to run (on most days). I especially love to run next to a green field with a blue sky and marvelous clouds above me. I love this world and the beauty that surrounds me here in my neck of the woods. My soul yearns for it.

I also appreciate and cherish the friendships that I've been able to make as I do my "time" training. My current/recent running friend is a great person that I've met as we've served on the Stake Girls Camp Board. I call her my little tender mercy. In the early spring I was a very sad, cynical, and disheartened person who was frustrated with her current lack of friendship and exercise options. I was missing my previous exercise life. At one of our girls camp meetings Heidi wore her running hat.  When I asked her about her hat and if she ran a lot she said she'd always wanted to run a marathon. I told her that I was thinking about doing the Teton Dam Half and invited her to join. When Heidi acted interested I didn't dare get excited – it took me a while before I got my hope up again. You see it is a rare thing to find a person who is willing to wake up and run at 5:30 in the morning and is dependable and consistent.  Lucky me, Heidi is all of these things. Plus here is a fun side note: Heidi also has a road bike! Sweetness. This is a perfect combo for me – run 2 days, ride 2 days. Perfect.

So I'm here to thank Heidi for this memory and also for restoring my exercise ambition, hope, and determination as I trained to run 13.1 dam miles. 

Aweome Family!	How sweet is this?	Victory
oh ya	Happy and surprised to see my family. Stephen is the coolest.	Hugs help
gearing up for Summer’s Hill	I really did the half – not the team marathon like my bib declares.

Eric, Me, Scott, Michelle, & Brad

As I grew up as a granddaughter to my Grandpa & Grandma Baldwin I think I gravitated to bonding with my Grandpa more because he was funny and loud. I was supported by both in many of the important events in my life such as: baptism, graduation, marriage and many other orchestral and choral events. Whenever I think of my Grandparents, I see my Grandpa standing out in front and my Grandma contentedly standing to the side smiling, happy for him to have the attention. She was the gentle, loving, & quiet service doer. I loved them both dearly for different reasons. 

 

Yesterday I gathered with my family in Blackfoot, ID to celebrate and honor the life of my sweet Grandma Lila Vinette Lemmon Baldwin. I was surprised at the flood of emotions that surfaced for me. They didn't come only because of the loss I feel from my Grandma graduating from her earthly body, but I felt an overwhelming amount of gratitude for the wonderful (quiet) example my grandma was every 96 years of her life. She just lived what she believed and loved all of mankind. As I peered at her lifeless body and her temple recommend placed under her frail hand I was very proud! She didn't leave behind wealth and earthly treasures, but a testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ and enduring well to the end. I hope to become a parcel of the person my Grandma was able to became.

 

I had the unique opportunity to to sing with my brothers and sister and many of the 42 cousins at her funeral. We sang, "Families Can Be Together Forever." I pretty much lip synced the song because the words were ringing so true & loudly in my ears. The potential that we have for our eternal family is quite a bounteous gift from our Heavenly Father. As I contemplate the posterity that have come from one woman and one man – my grandparents, it is astounding! I find myself thinking of the time when I looked into the mirrors of the temple in the sealing room. As I think about looking to the future, envisioning my future posterity, then turning behind and looking to the past – my heritage, I find that I am beginning to understand the potential and grand design of the Plan that has been laid out for each of us. I feel so thankful to be born and raised to know of these truths and to understand the blessings that are possible as I aim to live together forever with my family. 

 

We were encouraged as grandchildren to keep a journal – as much of my grandmothers life sketch came from her journal entries. We were also encouraged to look to the scriptures for all of the questions in our lives. The scripture 4 Nephi 1:15 was quoted and modified to fit our family, "And it came to pass that there was no contention in the [homes of the families of Frank & Lila Baldwin], because of the love of God which did dwell in the hearts of [the family members of Frank & Lila Baldwin]."

 

If we genuinely hope to live together in the eternities with our families, what better advice could we have received and what greater action could we use to honor our grandparents for the wonderful heritage for which we have been blessed? 

 

Obituary Lila Lemmon Baldwin, 96

Lila Lemmon Baldwin, 96, of Rockford, Idaho passed away May 22, 2011 at her home.

She was born February 21, 1915 in Garfield, Idaho the youngest daughter of Washington Lemmon and Ida Ethel Hamilton.

Her early childhood was spent in Marysville, near Ashton, Idaho. In 1928, her father bought a large farm in Tyhee, Idaho. She graduated from LDS Seminary and from Pocatello High School in 1933.

On September 29, 1937 she married Franklin Reed Baldwin in the Salt Lake LDS Temple. The lived in Pocatello until 1947. They settled in Moreland where all of their children graduated from Snake River High School. In 1973 they moved to Rockford.

Service was her best attribute. As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints she served diligently in all of the Church auxiliaries. She and Frank served full-time missions to Calgary Canada; Nauvoo, Illinois and at the Salt Lake City Utah Family History Center.

She had a career with her sewing machine. She mastered making clothing so that she could add to the family income. She learned the art of custom drapery making in her home.

Lila knew how to milk a cow, make butter and kill a chicken. She always raised a garden – growing everything.

Lila is survived by one brother, Byron Lemmon of Bountiful, Utah; three sons, Paul Reed of Rockford, Stephen Lee (Pat) of Rexburg, Frank Lynn (Connie) of Riverton, Utah; three daughters, Serena (Max) Watt of Rockford, Marilyn (Bob) Kesler of Blackfoot and Joan (Blaine) Dance of Sandy Valley, Nevada; son-in-law, LuDell Evans of Blackfoot; 43 grandchildren, 101 great grandchildren; and 2 great great grandchildren.

She is preceded in death by her parents; husband, Frank; daughter, Ruth Evans; six brothers, Guy, Melvin, Don, Verlon, Eugene and Weir; three sisters, Laura, Florence and Faye; one granddaughter; three great granddaughters.

A funeral service will be held at 11 a.m. on Saturday, May 28, 2011 at the Blackfoot West LDS Stake Center.

silly girls – Lexi & Bridget
	Lex, Grant, & Bridget	Grace & Lily
Magan, Jeana, & I	Emily & Lex	Grandma & a few Grandkids
Me & Dallen (he graduates this week from HS!!!)	The Sisters	Excited about their ride back to the church in a limo
First time for me inside of limo	Babes!

Comments:

Anne said…

Jodi it sounds like a wonderful and emotional day full of mixed feelings. Your grandparents sound wonderful. It is not easy to say goodbye, however I too am grateful for the gospel knowledge that helps :).
Monday, May 30, 2011 7:06:32 AM

Michelle said…

Thanks for sharing-funerals are a great time to realize what our knowledge of the gospel really means.
Wednesday, June 01, 2011 8:43:52 AM

This week in particular I have been experiencing some "once in a life time" mom moments here on the battlefront.

I started the week off last Sunday morning snuggled up to Olivia in my bed. She had come in early morning for consolation and I pulled her onto my bed so I wouldn't upset my slumber. Along came 6 am – and I heard the starting signs of throwing up. I acted quickly and shot upright, scooped her up and it was too late. Stinky, chunky throw up right in my face and down the front of my shirt, over ALL of our bed covers, all over her clothes, in her hair – you get the picture don't you? NOT cool. I haven't ever, in my almost 14 years of being a mom, experienced throw up puddled on my face – Urine? Yes. Puke. No.  

Another first relating to throw up was 2 weeks prior. Olivia and JT were both camping out in our bed with us when Olivia started to "loose her cookies", immediately as if on cue – JT began to spew forth. I thought to myself…"synchronized throw up, now that is a first?"

Yesterday I was fixing my hair while JT was making a potty break in my bathroom. He sat there chatting and then he said, "Mom, we have a stinking dirty house. We need to clean our house."  He was saying this as he peered into the disgusting toilet. All the toilets in our house have been working over time with urgent vomiting attacks and they have met their match. They really were gross! So, today I decided to have JT help me get things cleaned up. We were in my bathroom once again, when he exclaimed, "Mom, I have really long teeth." I had my back turned to him as I was cleaning my sinks. I was on autopilot nodding my head, when I snapped out of it!  I turned around to see him brushing his teeth with my "old cleaning toothbrushes!" I freaked, lost it, screamed so loud I scared the little fella. He immediately began crying out of fear from my exclamations. I had Olivia go downstairs to retrieve his toothbrush. I brushed and scrubbed his teeth and tongue better than I ever have (several times) – I had him drink tons of water to try and flush out the germs. Even as I type I am shuddering and fearful of what can/could happen.

I tell you what, the adventures I'm experiencing right now are keeping me young as I'm beginning to get gray hair and wrinkles.

Comments:

Stacie said…

I feel your pain! Cooper has been in the same boat! He had it out both ends. Thank heavens for good diapers with elastic! He threw up in his own bed while I layed next to him. I managed to avoid the whole face thing! Nasty!
Sunday, May 22, 2011 10:39:30 PM

Anne said…

Um, sometimes being a mom can be yucky too, throw up in the face, yuck! Good thing the smiles, hugs, and “I love you’s” happen too!
Saturday, May 28, 2011 7:07:02 AM

me and my kiddos on mother’s day

This week I have a few things on my mind. Things that matter and make a difference to me. Things I want to write down to preserve.

First and foremost I would like to document that yesterday I enjoyed the sunshine! We have gone without sunshine for many days this spring and I can't tell you how good the sun felt to my skin! I celebrated by weeding my flower beds and helping Stephen transplant bushes in the flower beds. I am looking forward to a plentiful harvest from our new garden spot, and anticipate the annual Sugar flower sale next Saturday. 

As of two days ago, Stephen was officially offered (and he accepted the offer) a job at BYUI.  We have been mulling over and praying about it for 3 weeks! (Check out his blog for full details) I want to add here on how receiving a firm confirmation to an earnest prayer really helps you feel that Heavenly Father loves you and is aware of your current and future needs. And also give you the courage to have faith in His personal plan for you. 

Yesterday I was able to go to Idaho Falls with Diana and take a tour of her home that she is moving back to in a couple of weeks. It was fun to see and to chat with her a little more than we have in the past few busy months. We went to lunch at my favorite bakery there: Babe's Bakery, where they make the most delicious turkey avocado crescent sandwich. It made me reminiscent of my pregnant craving from 6 years ago. I am very grateful for the friendship of my "sister" friend. It is a blessing to have a friend that knows your life stories and personal weaknesses and likes you anyway. It has been a cherished treasure to learn from and get to know my friend. She is a remarkable person. From the words of one of my favorite songs, "I do believe I have been changed for the better….because I knew you."

Because of the void I have felt come upon me from knowing my "sister" friend is moving, I was happy to discover a new running buddy. Heidi is on the Stake Girls Camp Board with me and as we began talking decided to train for the Teton Dam Half Marathon together. I count this as a tender mercy and gift from Heavenly Father. It has been not only good to do this physically, but very healing emotionally as I was having sad thoughts of the Puzey family moving. Heidi has been so fun to get to know and I am inspired by her exercise work ethics. She even has a road bike, and I hope to get in on some long bike rides with her.

Watching my kids grow up is bittersweet. I have been recognizing the sweet parts of it recently from soccer games to decorating teacher doors, personal progress progression (Lex will get her Medalion by her birthday!), Impending camps (girls, scout, cedar badge, soccer), Dare graduation, listening to funny comments and even anticipating a zoo field trip. It is so good to be a mom. I LOVE it. I feel happy and content being able to stay home with them to listen and learn and sometimes teach.

Recently, I have taken notice of how nice it is to have chosen the simple road. This year I have helped at the school only as needed – I didn't bring extra things in. I've found that just being a room mom keeps me involved enough! And I only did that because they called and asked me to do it. Otherwise I have been flying under the radar. As far as church stuff is concerned: I get to teach the lesson in RS once a month. Great! Recently I have been helping with girls camp and it is fun and a little busy, but I have noticed a difference in not having to worry about planning sharing times, activity days, conducting, scout stuff, nursery stuff, etc. It has been so amazing to have a time in my life to be (somewhat) still. I have noticed how awesome it is to take time to act upon ideas or thoughts that come in quiet moments. To give a friend a call that I've been thinking about, to write a note, to use my time to really study the scriptures more.  I am writing all of this and remembering that in 2 weeks the storm will come, with school out and the demands of 5 kids at home all day kicks in…..I am going to brace myself!

But really it has all been lovely.

I just love this boy!		Little date with the Kirkham girls to Orange Leaf
For one of Lexi’s last value projects she put a youth choir together. They performed the song by Jennie Phillips,	Cute sisters	Met up with Puzey girls @ Sugar Jr. Miss
3 generations		lexi’s spring club soccer team
lex in action	Jt being silly	Liv getting her legs warm
Lily and I decorated her teacher’s door for teacher appreciation week	Lily ran the mile in 9:26!	Stephen was there to run with and encourage not only Lily but ALL of the kids in her class!
Alexis especially loved the mock eclairs I made for dinner	Look what I found when I went this week to put up the sugar soccer posters at the JHS!	Am I biased or is she just the cutest?
Mason at Dare graduation… he is such a good boy!	Santa Lily	eating and breathing bubbles
	tub fun

I went out shopping in the metropolis of Rexburg. While my usual store to visit is Walmart, I remembered a cute navy blue vest JT's size on a rare visit I made to Kmart a month ago. I decided to go pick it up because it would match the new bow tie I had just made for JT. As I was walking through the aisles of Kmart I noticed a rack of ties in the men's section with the sign 30% off. I strolled by and found 2 acceptable ties that would work for Mason and Stephen. I thought of the comment Stephen made when I showed him the fabric I had used to cut out the ties for him and Mason with – he said, "those are bright." I was nervous that they would feel too "noticed" in the ties I was about to create, and when I saw these ties and the price of $6.99 next to them, it sealed the deal. It would be No Go for the home made Easter ties this year! I still plan on making the "bright" ties up for the future, maybe Mason will be brave enough to wear them both?!

Comments:

Steve Baldwin said…

Great pictures! Great Family! Thanks.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011 9:26:40 AM

Ri Ri said…

you have a cute family
Tuesday, April 26, 2011 7:19:45 PM

Magan said…

Cute kids! The dresses turned out so cute. My favorite is Lily’s.
Sunday, May 01, 2011 7:56:30 PM

I've been wondering what I could do for the boys at my house to give them a little piece of me for Easter. I have almost finished making all of my girl's something special so my focus is shifting to da boyz. You can imagine my delight when I came across this pattern for ties! And it is free!!!! Here is the link in case anyone else has a hankering to make a tie.

http://www.purlbee.com/fathers-day-ties/2009/5/21/mollys-sketchbook-fathers-day-tie.html?printerFriendly=true

I'm finding out that the older I get the better I can understand/learn certain aspects of this mortal existence; yet on the other hand, with that understanding, I discover just how much more there is to know – and so it goes.

Comments:

Ri Ri said…

I am so grateful for time. We all have it, so use it wisely.
Saturday, April 16, 2011 10:46:02 PM

Stacie said…

That is exactly what I am going to look like at 90!
Saturday, April 16, 2011 10:54:14 PM

I am kind of done with everyone complaining about the weather. It feels like it's been the same conversation for 3 months! BUT really, today is spring break and we woke up to a blanket of snow all over our yard. I guess to look at the glass half full I could consider how green all of this "moisture" will make my grass? When spring actually springs we will appreciate it soo much more this year.  Happy Break to us all. 🙂