I decided to make a highlight list of the things that I learned and don't want to forget from Education Week – so I have a good place to come and reference them when needed.
- We need good intrapersonal communication – an easier way to say it is to have a good relationship with ourselves! For increased positivity try doing the following for 21 days in a row: 1. meditate 5-10 minutes a day 2. exercise regularly for 30 min 3. Participate in random acts of kindess 2-3xs a day 4. express/feel gratitude 3-4 xs a day 5. Write at lest one of those things we are thankful for in a journal.
- Date Night Dancing – at BYUI every Friday night for $2/couple with BYUidaho card. Let Stephen lead. 🙂 We learned the Box step…slow, quick, quick, slow, quick, quick.
- 80% of a person's impression of you is visual. Teach kids the rules of good manners at a FHE. When meeting someone for the first time make eye contact, have a confidant & firm voice, a firm hand shake and use this format: GREETING (hello, hi, hey), BUSINESS (I'm first & last name), PLEASANTRY (I don't believe we've met). For a response you mirror the same format: GREETING, BUSINESS (reciprocate with your name), PLEASANTRY (It's noce to meet you). Do the "re-do" if you forget someone's name….just apologize and admit it and acknowledge where you think you've met before. NEVER say, "remember me?"
- HARD WORK & HUMILITY produce powerful spiritual growth" – President Clark (Use these words for our back to school motto this year!) Everything that matters requires hard work. Ether 12:27, pay attention to the word "may" – we have a choice. Sometimes the Lord says to us, "Your plan is NOT my plan."
- D&C 88:119 *Organize 1st, so we can do the rest. Start holding a parent "presidency meeting" to discuss the concerns of our kids and make a plan for ways to help them. David A. Bednar, "…overarching spiritual quest to fulfill the mandate to receive the Holy Ghost." The Holy Ghost protects our family. Galatians 5:22-23. Goal in our family should be to "just do a little better." D&C 64:33? small and simple things…Thanks John!
- Have Confidence in your own parenting. Have confidence in your kids. Confidence at useful skills develops self-esteem. Girls respond to colorful things and can hear 80% better than males. Boys need action and more volume and directness. Work alongside your kids when you can. When evaluating the work our kids do – have them do it! Q. what did you like? what could use a little more attention? Is this your best?
- Listening is hearing, understanding, remembering and responding. TOOLS: 1. acknowledge you can be a better listener and then practice it! 2. Take notes, especially on the critical conversations! 1 kings 19:11 also write down spiritual impressions. 3. Paraphrase – restate what is said 4. Use questions, only use "why" if it isn't used to ask about feelings.
- Watch finding Nemo and be a little more like the turtle – trust my kids to know their limits to stay within the parameters that have been laid out when adventuring. Allowing and encouraging kids to explore in adventures can create a healthy self- esteem and realization that they can do hard things. Participate in adventures with your kids, teach them the boundaries and then allow them to fly.
- Being the chocolate chip in the oven of life. (The chips keep shape when under pressure of heated oven) C.H.I.P. (Covenant keeping, Hold On – 2 Nephi 31:19-20 , Individuality with Integrity – D&C 124:15 love what is right, Personal Perfection – Moroni 10:32perfected means "finished, complete, whole" remember that Grace comes to us. think of this in terms of a daily experience NOT just at the culmination of life. Each day our perfect is at a different % and Christ's grace will come to us and make up the difference every time when we let it.
- Apply this quote by President Ezra Taft Benson about missionary work to parenting(or anything else): "When missionary work ceases to become an irritant and becomes a quest…in that moment you find great power!" Raising resilient kids (they are needed in the world and in the mission field) 1. Be kind and firm in what kids need to do. Don't give in when the whining and complaining ensue…stop rescuing them. 2. Teach children to do hard things….work past their comfort level. 3. teach them to problem solve, empower them to find their own answers and solutions. let them think for themselves when situations arise. Ask questions and support them even if you know it might not work. Let them learn and then support them in trying again when they fail. 4. Specifically validate their effort – not the action. Don't want kids to feel like the "things they do" is more important than the effort involved.
- Mosiah 4:30 (thoughts) watch the negative ones that can leave us feeling anxious. What is your 100% bad? Really think about it, it helps put worries, troubles, discouragement & hopelessness in the proper perspective. Replace the negative ones with positive thoughts like, "this is only 10% bad", "I can stand this", "I'm willing to submit", "I am a Child of God, I'm worth a lot", "I don't like it that's okay, I can stand it anyway".