Born to Live…Live to Die

Today I attended a funeral or can I say a celebration of a wonderful earthly life? Hopefully that doesn’t cause anyone to take offense, those words just resonate inside me better. I have come to approach death as a graduation from our earthly body. The funeral for me is a way for loved ones to be able to celebrate the things the earthly body was able to accomplish and to recognize the good deeds done, the ways a person was able to accomplish the mission they were sent to perform while here in their body. The beautiful thing that I am grateful to know is true – is that the person (in spirit) is still alive and continues on being the person they were here on earth…just in a better place.

I have been the observer of death on different levels, the granddaughter, the aunt, the friend, the cousin. While I have felt sadness and loss, disappointment, and grief. I don’t want to pretend to understand how difficult it must feel to be the wife, the daughter, the mother, the sister. Death has not come that close to home yet for me personally. I can’t imagine it nor do I want to. My heart hurts when I think of the aching that must go on. I have watched and heard from my own mother  – she has been the sister, the daughter, the niece, the cousin, the sister-in-law. She has taught me and I have learned from her faith. As I sat at my Grandfather Baldwin’s funeral I noticed her choking up – I leaned over and asked, "Are you thinking about your parents?" And she said, "No, I just know it is all true!" A speaker was talking about the plan of salvation. My own eyes brimmed with tears and my heart knew what she said was right. Through her faith I was blessed with the same knowledge.

As a young girl I attended many funerals and have continued to as the years have progressed. I feel blessed to have witnessed with my two eyes and one heart the effects of death in all of its sweetness. I have seen Christ-like actions: loving neighbors and friends offering to help in anyway, countless food items dropped by, a note expressing condolences.  But even more tender are those of caressing hands on a sweating brow,  the gentle guiding of uneasy steps, the brushing of gray, curly hair, the painting of  toenails, the blanket sewn to cover a chill. These pictures have been painted on my heart as witnesses of genuine Christ – like love in perfect action. I am humbled when I think of the love that can exist and be expressed from one human to another. It is sweet, yes, very sweet.

I happen to thumb through the Bible on Saturday when I found myself open to Ecclesiastes chapter 7. I don’t ever remember reading this chapter before in the 34 years I’ve been alive. It seemed timely as I have been contemplating the meaning of death….

"A good name is better than precious ointment; and the day of death than the day of one’s birth. IT is better to go to the house of mourning, than to go to the house of feasting; for that is the end of all men; and the living will lay it to his heart. Sorrow is better than laughter: for by sadness of the countenance the heart is made better. The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning;…"

After reading this I then remembered the only chapter think I have actually read in Ecclesiastes before Saturday – chapter 3. "To ever thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die, a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; A time to weep, and a time to laugh, a time to mourn, and a time to dance; A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace."

Last thought, today in the closing remarks of "the celebration of a wonderful life" a.k.a. the funeral, the Bishop quoted Elder Russell M. Nelson as saying, "We are born to live and we live to die." I hung onto this thought and added it to my list of acquired thoughts. It is true we are born to live on this earth – to learn to grow and become who we are meant to be. We live here on earth so that when we die (or turn in our earthly bodies) we will be prepared to qualify for exaltation.

I have faith in my Heavenly Father. I know His plan for us in perfect and we can trust Him in that He knows the right time for all things. We are here to learn of His plan,  to show we can trust Him with it, and strive to become like Him as long as His timing allows.

Comments:

Anne said…

Jodi, I appreciate these thoughtful words. It truly is a gift we have to be able to celebrate the knowledge of eternal life.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010 1:46:34 PM

Bruce said…

To live within the principles of truth is a real treasure.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010 5:48:52 PM

Magan said…

Wonderfully written jodi
Tuesday, January 12, 2010 8:36:51 PM

Born to Live…Live to Die

Today I attended a funeral or can I say a celebration of a wonderful earthly life? Hopefully that doesn’t cause anyone to take offense, those words just resonate inside me better. I have come to approach death as a graduation from our earthly body. The funeral for me is a way for loved ones to be able to celebrate the things the earthly body was able to accomplish and to recognize the good deeds done, the ways a person was able to accomplish the mission they were sent to perform while here in their body. The beautiful thing that I am grateful to know is true – is that the person (in spirit) is still alive and continues on being the person they were here on earth…just in a better place.

I have been the observer of death on different levels, the granddaughter, the aunt, the friend, the cousin. While I have felt sadness and loss, disappointment, and grief. I don’t want to pretend to understand how difficult it must feel to be the wife, the daughter, the mother, the sister. Death has not come that close to home yet for me personally. I can’t imagine it nor do I want to. My heart hurts when I think of the aching that must go on. I have watched and heard from my own mother  – she has been the sister, the daughter, the niece, the cousin, the sister-in-law. She has taught me and I have learned from her faith. As I sat at my Grandfather Baldwin’s funeral I noticed her choking up – I leaned over and asked, “Are you thinking about your parents?” And she said, “No, I just know it is all true!” A speaker was talking about the plan of salvation. My own eyes brimmed with tears and my heart knew what she said was right. Through her faith I was blessed with the same knowledge.

As a young girl I attended many funerals and have continued to as the years have progressed. I feel blessed to have witnessed with my two eyes and one heart the effects of death in all of its sweetness. I have seen Christ-like actions: loving neighbors and friends offering to help in anyway, countless food items dropped by, a note expressing condolences.  But even more tender are those of caressing hands on a sweating brow,  the gentle guiding of uneasy steps, the brushing of gray, curly hair, the painting of  toenails, the blanket sewn to cover a chill. These pictures have been painted on my heart as witnesses of genuine Christ – like love in perfect action. I am humbled when I think of the love that can exist and be expressed from one human to another. It is sweet, yes, very sweet.

I happen to thumb through the Bible on Saturday when I found myself open to Ecclesiastes chapter 7. I don’t ever remember reading this chapter before in the 34 years I’ve been alive. It seemed timely as I have been contemplating the meaning of death….

“A good name is better than precious ointment; and the day of death than the day of one’s birth. IT is better to go to the house of mourning, than to go to the house of feasting; for that is the end of all men; and the living will lay it to his heart. Sorrow is better than laughter: for by sadness of the countenance the heart is made better. The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning;…”

After reading this I then remembered the only chapter think I have actually read in Ecclesiastes before Saturday – chapter 3. “To ever thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die, a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; A time to weep, and a time to laugh, a time to mourn, and a time to dance; A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.”

Last thought, today in the closing remarks of “the celebration of a wonderful life” a.k.a. the funeral, the Bishop quoted Elder Russell M. Nelson as saying, “We are born to live and we live to die.” I hung onto this thought and added it to my list of acquired thoughts. It is true we are born to live on this earth – to learn to grow and become who we are meant to be. We live here on earth so that when we die (or turn in our earthly bodies) we will be prepared to qualify for exaltation.

I have faith in my Heavenly Father. I know His plan for us in perfect and we can trust Him in that He knows the right time for all things. We are here to learn of His plan,  to show we can trust Him with it, and strive to become like Him as long as His timing allows.

You are Here

The other day I caught myself going through the motions again, I had turned on my auto pilot switch unconsciously. I was in a hurry. I was completely and utterly distracted. I most definitely was NOT ready to appreciate and respect the NOW.

I remembered having a conversation with my dear friend who is watching her father prepare to exit this temporary life in which we live. She commented on how she would not be taking any precious moments for granted. With this in mind, I stopped and thought about what I was doing and how I could cherish it more. I wonder why it is such a hard thing for me to appreciate the gift of life and choose to make a conscience effort to take all of life in tangibly.

I easily saw that I have become too busy – I need to slow down a little and zone in on what is going on. Let’s think of the Mary and Martha story from the scriptures…I’m sure many others could go along with this thought as well.Can you see where this is going? Yes. A new year’s resolution – and more! I have now decided to make this my mantra for the year – Live in the Moment (notice my new slogan). I found the following article a helpful reminder on how to, Slow down…Zone in…and Live in the Moment.

Ski School?

Mason and I spent the night skiing up at Kelly Canyon tonight.  I always thought I would never have kids in ski school, I thought it was a waste of time and money.  Since the 5th graders can ski for any resort in Idaho this year for $15, decision to go was much easier.

Mason said something to me that I was impressed by and changed my perspective on so called Ski School.  He said, "It has to be educational or else the school is not allowed to do it".  Sounds simple, but to me that means it has to benefit the kids not just be a joy ride.

It was time well spent to be up there just one on one with Mason, we were learning new snowboarding techniques, but that was just a fraction of the education.  Mason and I were able to learn more about each other, our likes, fears, skills.  But above all this I learned that Mason has a very cautious and concerned spirit.  He was very mindful of my safety and of my well being the entire time.  I appreciated his gentle persuasions to keep me from doing anything too crazy.  I also had the chance to become the student as Mason would coach me on how to do certain tricks.

I can hardly wait until this Friday night to continue the private school with Mason.

AMA Challenge – Joins ADA Tour de Cure

It’s official I am now a member of the American Diabetes Association’s Tour de Cure Team!  This means that all the profits from the AMA Challenge and from donations to the team will go directly to the ADA’s Tour de Cure fundraising event to help find the cure for diabetes.

Please take a moment to check it out, I am very excited about this and hope you will share this with everyone you know.

Please click the link below to sponsor me!

American Diabetes Association’s Tour de Cure fundraising event

Thank You.

You are Here

The other day I caught myself going through the motions again, I had turned on my auto pilot switch unconsciously. I was in a hurry. I was completely and utterly distracted. I most definitely was NOT ready to appreciate and respect the NOW. 

I remembered having a conversation with my dear friend who is watching her father prepare to exit this temporary life in which we live. She commented on how she would not be taking any precious moments for granted. With this in mind, I stopped and thought about what I was doing and how I could cherish it more. I wonder why it is such a hard thing for me to appreciate the gift of life and choose to make a conscience effort to take all of life in tangibly.

I easily saw that I have become too busy – I need to slow down a little and zone in on what is going on. Let’s think of the Mary and Martha story from the scriptures…I’m sure many others could go along with this thought as well.Can you see where this is going? Yes. A new year’s resolution – and more! I have now decided to make this my mantra for the year – Live in the Moment (notice my new slogan). I found the following article a helpful reminder on how to, Slow down…Zone in…and Live in the Moment.

www.wikihow.com/Live-in-the-Moment

Comments:

michelle said…

I agree Jodi-I am an expert at zoning out. Thanks for the reminder.
Tuesday, January 05, 2010 12:45:01 PM

Stephen said…

I am glad to know where you are…because then I find myself too.
Tuesday, January 05, 2010 3:56:03 PM

Bruce said…

I have a book of poems entitled “Always Begin Where You Are.” I’ve always liked that phrase. Too much past or too much future really get us into trouble.
Wednesday, January 06, 2010 6:34:34 PM

Stacie said…

I need to try harder to zone in! I am reading a book on the Mary and Martha story! You are welcome to borrow it when I am finished! It takes a view from both sides! We do get ourselves and kids over scheduled that’s for sure!
Thursday, January 07, 2010 10:59:24 AM

2010

Stephen said to our children, "I never thought I’d see the year 2010. When I was a kid that just seemed so far away!" 

Today is the official first day of 2010. We welcomed in the new year with a bang by eating fondue – sweetened condensed boiled in the can on the stovetop for 1-1/2  (it turns to something like caramel) then dipping cut up apples and bananas in it. Before that we played lots of fun games and laughed. Lex, Lily, Olivia and I made some 2010 glasses earlier in the day to help ring in the new year. BTW – I did get my first new year’s kiss at 12:midnight! All of our family were able to stay up until midnight – even JT! He was a die hard.

We spent the rest of today having fun in the snow and playing with the Parker Family at a "Christmas Party" where all of the children opened their highly anticipated gift from Grandpa & Grandma Parker – traditional p.j.’s personally labeled for each child! Each shirt said "cousin power" and then the child’s name. Lot’s of work for Grandma! She has been busy, I wonder how she found time in the middle of building a house, moving, and cleaning! Pretty amazing I think. It was fun that all of Stephen’s siblings were here together.

I was really sad that the weather didn’t cooperate for us to go to Utah to spend time with the Baldwins! All of our children were upset too! We really wanted to go see my mom, "Grandma Baldwin" for her 64th birthday. We made it to Pocatello when we decided to turn around. We had seen 8 cars off of the road and the storm seemed to be getting worse. Plus, you can’t deny feelings when you don’t feel good about something right? Wish we could have been there, I’m sure we missed out on lots of fun memories!

We were also busy resanding and staining 1000+ square feet of hardwood flooring earlier this week. It was a pretty big mess, but worth it in the end. The floor looks fabulous.

Tomorrow is sure to bring more social events that will keep all of the children bouncing with excitement. There is never a dull moment around here – although I wouldn’t mind one once in a while?!

Comments:

michelle said…

I like the glasses! they look great-thanks for the fun memories-we always love spending time with our fun family.
Sunday, January 03, 2010 10:12:44 PM

Stephen said…

It wouldn’t be any fun without Jodi, she makes life monumental.
Wednesday, January 06, 2010 11:02:14 PM

Tender Mercies

This past week we spent a few days at the cabin.  While there we had many great and fun experiences, along with them we had some pretty scary ones.  One such scary one was when Mason and I were in the garage changing the battery in the snowmachine.  I was busy inside taking care of some issues at work, and instructing Mason one step at a time on how to change the battery.  He would run and do a step then report back for the next instructions.  I soon realized he didn’t really need the detailed instructions, he was doing much better with just letting him know the goal.  He soon had the oil reservoir off and the air cleaner removed.  I then ran out real quick to help him replace the battery and button the machine back up.

All went well we tested the new battery it worked great.  So I thought I would top off the gasoline while I was already out there.  We struggled with the can because we couldn’t find a good funnel.  We think at least 4 of the 5 gallons made it into the tank, the rest went on the floor and all over the tools we were using.  I am not sure if it was the fumes of gasoline in the air or childhood memories that helped me think of the next brilliant idea.  I asked Mason to run in the house and grab some matches, and told him we could burn off the gas on the wrenches.  I knew that there was gas all around the floor of the snowmachine so I walked clear up to the driveway of the garage at least 20′ away from the spill sight.  I lit the first match and the wrenches burned pretty clean but there was still some on the other side of them so I flipped them over and lit another match.  It was just like the movies, the flames burst into the air, across the ceiling of the garage and down to the gasoline soaked snowmachine.  I couldn’t believe my eyes, partially because they were singed and burned from the flames I suppose.  I ran over to the ball of fire and began to try and smother it with any form of cover I could find, nothing helped.  I ran in the house remembering there used to be a fire extinguisher that fell one time and hit grandpa on the head, he must have moved it in frustration because the nail was still there but no extinguisher was in sight.  I ran back out and began to through snow, dirt, or anything I could see that would help douse the flames.

Within seconds the entire garage was filled with a thick black, suffocating smoke.  I would run in and out of the garage to get some fresh air between feeble attempts to extinguish the flames.  By this time the kids had seen the panic on my face and ran into the cabin to inform Jodi that, "Dad is on fire and so is the garage."  I felt a burning sensation on my right foot and looked down to find my entire leg was engulfed in flames.  Without hesitation I ran out into the snow to relieve the burning and put out the newly found blaze.  It was at this time that I thought in my heart, "well it is just a cabin."  I was out of breath my leg was in pain the flames were so out of control now that the surrounding materials were catching flame.  It was a matter of time before the plastic gas tank would melt and spill the entire tank of gas on the floor.  It was hopeless.  If I can’t get the small amount of gas extinguished how can I battle 5 gallons of it.  As typical in my life, I was in over my head.  Just then Jodi came running to my side, it was as if the fire department had arrived, I felt a new sense of motivation.  Like a machine she began helping through snow on the blaze.  With the help of her and Mason we were able to get the situation in control, we pushed and pulled the burning machine out of the garage and almost buried it in snow from our shovels.  We then rolled the machine over so we could get more snow on the track that would not stop burning.

I wish I could have had the entire event of camera because I am certain Jodi, Mason, and I put on a great show as we ran in and out of the garage with shovels throwing snow on the blaze.  We were all coughing from the smoke as we were trying to keep the frantic pace up.  I would like to think that we put out this blaze but I know that a power greater than our entire families’ efforts was there helping us.  The tank should have melted or at least the fuel lines coming out of it.  Everything else on the machine melted why stop there?  Tender Mercies!  It seems that everyday I get more and more in debt to the Savior,  He is always there, whether I deserve the mercy or not.  When I called to break the bad news to Dad, he was very understanding and loving.  He informed me that maybe Grandpa Parker and Michele were there as well, helping in our efforts.

We were pretty bummed about the whole event, but rallied as a family and performed a major overhaul on the the two machines up there, the other twin to this machine had a burned up engine.  Dad said we could make it into a project sometime to swap them out.  Lex and Mason were more than excited to help and we were able to make the switch and spend some fun times riding. snowboarding,  and sledding behind the newly overhauled machine.  I will always cherish the time we spent as a team overhauling the machines out there in the cold garage.  Someday I may look back and laugh, but today I I full of gratitude for the "hidden help" we received.

Where there’s a will…there is JT

JT is a funny, cute, talkative, crazy, & sometimes destructive little boy full of determination and persistance.

We love him and are generally found laughing at him and his ways…BUT sometimes we get tired at night trying to keep up with him and his business! I love his age so much – I look forward to him waking up each day and seeing his cute smile. I also look forward to bedtime after a tiring day of chasing. I wouldn’t have it any other way!

JT can say many words: He calls Lexi (Exi), Mason (Meesown), Lily (can’t really say it "L’s" are hard and she has 2), Olivia (via). We love it when he walks around after someone toots and tells everyone "_____ is poopy". He did this today in Nursery. He told his teacher he was poopy and she brought him to me. I went to go change him and he was dry as a bone – I think he must have just tooted. Funny boy. He loves to talk very loudly too by the way which makes Sacrament meeting fun :). He almost always puts a "y" or "ies" on the end of his words: panties (aka – pants), sockeys, shirty, spoony, etc..

JT loves to build with blocks and then knock them over. He is pretty good and throwing them at people too – we are working with him on that one. He is into matchbox cars and any toy that makes noise. His favortie bedtime songs are "I am a child of God" and "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star." I noticed that he does not like to have his socks taken off or gloves if he has them on. He also doesn’t like it if one shoe falls off and the other one is still on – it makes him very stressed. He like his pairs in pairs I guess. He loves to play with mine or Stephen’s iphones! He is great at unlocking it and knows just what buttons to push to get what he wants, he is a fast learner. This iphone fetish has come in handy on many occasions when we need to keep his mind busy at a choir concert or doctor office. The toddler applications are my favorite downloads!

He is a great eater and will eat most anything that is put in front of him. He is also good at playing with his food. At the end of most meals he has dumped his drink onto his food.

And last but not least, because it happens over and over throughout the day – he loves to use a barstool to get what he needs. We raise independent children around here!

Holiday Who-rah!

The party girl was on it again and insisted on a Christmas party with her friends. She invited 16 girls, but when all was said and done only 5 came. Lots went out of town and all of her friends (5) from the ward were grounded or had company. The instructions were to come in their favorite who-do and to bring a gift to exchange. It was fun to see what they came up with. There was good food, rock climbing, and they watched "The Grinch" with Jim Carrey. It was fun for Lex to get to have her friends from school over – the ones that she is always talking about.. When inviting friends over we usually stick with the ones from our ward because they live closer. I appreciated getting to know them and why Lex likes them – they are all great girls! Cute as ever and funny too!